12/26/2025

A new beginning and some technological lessons learned.  

I just spent the better part of an hour writing a very heart felt and wonderful blog post…all lost to technological difficulties and login errors, in a land far, far away from home! No, not really far, far away. Just Canada.  

I thought I was logged into my server and continued to type and when I was done (for what I thought was a great Blog Post) it was blasted into infinity, because I wasn’t really logged in at all. I was (and still am a little pissed off about it), but I will attempt to rewrite it again, using a word editor and not the F***ing online app/ Tool. Because, it is a total tool!  LOL!! So, lesson learned (Type it off-line, and then post it!).

So, here is the re-write:

After Lisa passed away in August, my Uncle Ron (I know he doesn’t like it when I refer to him with that title, but he will always be that to me), my Brother, and my Sister-in-Law…all persuaded me to get out of the house and start living my life…again, on my own terms, in my own way. Ron had invited me (and my dog, Sammie) to join him on an off road adventure in Nevada.  I was mostly interested in the idea because it would allow me the opportunity to spread some of Lisa’s ashes in one of hers and my favorite places…Black Rock Desert, Nevada.

I struggled to muster the energy to pack for the trip…but I knew in my heart that if I didn’t go, it would eat at my soul and that I would wind up just sitting at home feeling sorry for myself, wallowing in complete sorrow and agonizing over the loss of my wife, my love, my best friend, and regretting forever that I didn’t go on that trip to Nevada.

The past four and a half years were filled with fleeting moments…as we struggled through her metastatic breast cancer treatments, therapies…Dr’s appointments, accidental hospitalizations, and ultimately her hospice care, and ultimate death. It had been a brutal, heartbreaking, and agonizing experience.  It took everything I had to keep going for her and for myself, and after she passed away, I didn’t know what to do or what to feel.  

After her passing, with the constant reflection of nearly twenty years, of the very best years of my life, realizing they were gone forever…in an instant. After such a brutal and debilitating disease…all I wanted to do was stay at home and feel nothing.  

This trip to Nevada felt like I was being duped into an illusion of life after loss…but, to my surprise I actually enjoyed the journey. It had its challenges, but it was an experience that I now cherish and want to repeat. That Journey changed me, and my perspectives on life and death!  It was that experience that made me stay the course for Lisa’s and my plans for Christmas in Victoria B.C. this year. And, since I hadn’t been to B.C. since 1999 or 2000. Lisa and I had it on our to-do list together for the past couple of years. 

So, doing the trip we had planned to do together…was easier to do alone thanks to Ron, my brother and his wife, all thanks to that trip in Nevada, just a couple months ago.  I am most grateful for their kick in the pants!

So, Sammie (my dog) and I made the trek from Portland to Port Angeles, Wa. to catch the BlackBall Ferry to Victoria on December 23rd, 2025. We arrived at the Ferry Terminal…and were in line for the next crossing…with about an hour to wait for boarding, I noticed a car with Oregon Plates that had a Star Trek – Star-fleet sticker on the fender.  after a few minutes…I decided to go and express my utter admiration for their sticker and potentially revel in our collective enjoyment of Sci-Fi taste! 

 I approached their car and motioned for the driver to roll the window down so we could talk.  When he did so, I mentioned that I too was a huge Star Trek fan…and it sparked a conversation that lasted about ten minutes.  We ended our conversation and then I popped back to my lane and back into my truck, realizing that I had a few spare Star Trek Magazines from the early 2000s that I always have in my vehicles for reading, in case of long waiting situations. I grabbed a couple of the magazines and popped back out of my truck and ran over to offer them to him. His name is Adrian, and his Girlfriend is Kat. I then headed back to my truck and sat with the dog in great anticipation of the Ferry ride to Victoria.  

Less than five minutes had passed when Adrian came over to my truck to tell me of his Star Trek Celebrity moment with Jonathan Frakes…I then told him of my legendary interaction with Mark Leonard in 1987, we each laughed at the other’s story, and once those stories were told, he headed back to his car. 

Sammie and I boarded the Coho Ferry, parked the truck, made our way to the dog friendly out-side seating area and made ready for our first ever, together crossing to Canada.  Shortly after we departed Port Angeles for Victoria, Adrian and Kat joined us in the aft outside seating area.  We spent most of the crossing just talking about Portland, Star, trek and our dogs.  We agreed to meet-up when we were in Victoria and as we got close to our Victoria arrival, we parted ways politely.  

I really didn’t expect that we would meet again. I was happy when Adrian texted me on Christmas Eve, with potential plans to meet for Christmas day brunch.  Sadly, on Christmas day the weather turned quite sour…with rain and winds that would detour most anyone from venturing outside. Sammie and I had been walking through Beacon Hill Park for an hour or so when the rains began, and we started heading back to our hotel when Adrian texted me cancelling out for the day.  I was not offended at all by the cancellation.  Sammie was soaked like a wet bath-mat as was I.  My camera was a little moist too!  

Adrian and Kat were able to meet up with Sammie and me at the Commons, this evening (Boxing Day) across from the Fairmont Empress (or simply “The Empress Hotel”) for those who know! We had a lovely time…again talking about Portland, Europe (Kat is originally from Poland), work, life, and everything else. We had a great night.

I think Sammie and I have made some new friends, that are local to our home-town area (Portland, Oregon) and they are genuinely my type of people.  I was honored to spend a little time getting to know them here in Victoria, and I hope to connect with them again when Sammie and I are home again.  It was nice to meet such wonderful people with so much in common, while being abroad in a “foreign land” (even though Canada is anything but foreign to me).

All of this…thanks to my family and their concerns for my mental health after Lisa passed away.  If I had given up, stayed at home back in late September – early October, I wouldn’t have found the courage to do the trip(s) that Lisa and I had planned together.  That I am doing them now…has given me the chance to make new friends and enjoy new experiences. Thanks Ron, Drake, and Heather!  I deeply appreciate your concern for my well being, and I am grateful for your recommendations for me to move forward with my life!  

Thank you to Adrian and Kat for making the time to join us. I/ we, look forward to our next meeting, abroad or locally in Portland!